It’s funny that we use baptism as a picture of our death, burial and resurrection, declaring that because we said a prayer, supposedly gave our life to Jesus Christ, that we are new creatures in Christ. Oh how I wish it was that easy!
Let me first be clear that I know we-spirits are all one in Christ! However, to experience that abundant life, the peace that passes all understanding, we must go on a journey of becoming a new creature in Christ on this earth.
The spiritual death is not the death of our old life or even the death of the ego, but rather dying to the identification as the egotistical personality! My egotistical body/mind personality has been called Rhonda in this life, but I’ve discovered on this journey it’s not who I truly am and that is freedom!
Being a trail blazer out of the darkness of the egotistical mind and into the light of our oneness of Christ, my hope is that for those who are ready to set out on this journey, they will glean from my experiences and their journey will be shorter and less painful.
Reflecting upon my journey thus far, seeing how the past 5 years has been the internal work of healing trauma, seeing my ego and learning to live in awareness of it, so I can take control and do the opposite of it. I see this is the first part of the journey home or stage one “death of ego identification!”
Ram Dass in his book Be Love Now, says ” As you keep giving up the habits and thoughts that hold you back from loving, the ego’s fear of letting go dissolves in the love. From the ego’s vantage point you surrender into love. From the soul’s vantage point you are coming home, the boundaries of separation are fading and the two are becoming one! As you begin to enter into Oneness and to become love, instead of perceiving from your ego, you’re perceiving from your soul. You are shifting you identification from ego to soul. You don’t kill your ego, you kill your identification with your ego. As you dissolve into love, your ego fades. You’re not thinking about loving; you’re just being love, radiating like the sun. That last step requires Grace.”
The second part of the journey or stage two is the “burial!” I’ve been feeling like I’m cleaning house with Christ. I no longer feel like I’m Rhonda, Gypsy Spirit and Christ have taken over this body/mind and cleaning out all the egotistical residue or nooks and crannies in this body/mind, that has been left behind. This residue consist of tiny, subtle pieces of: Fear, Compromising, Deception, Assumptions, Isolation, Obligations, Guilt etc. so that we (Gypsy/Christ) can emerge as the oneness that we are.
The third part of the journey or stage 3 of transformation and the return home to heaven on earth, is the resurrection. The emergence as a new spirit or new creature in Christ, the one who was veiled by the egotistical body/mind, who is devoted to Jesus Christ.
In A Course In Miracles, Jesus says that “a healed mind doesn’t plan.” Stage two is all about this, because it’s moment by moment of being present, living in awareness of not only the egotistical residue, but constantly following the guidance of Christ. No longer living according to the ego’s thoughts, feelings and emotions, but rather that deep knowing of what I should be doing! This deep knowing, is rooted in that deep love and devotion to Christ.
As I look back over Rhonda’s life, I see now how Jesus Christ is my guru, constantly giving me supernatural experiences that slowly created a deep trust and relationship with Him. If I didn’t get to know Christ through deep conversations, I wouldn’t have ever trusted Him with my life, which led me to this moment of transformation and restoration.
If you want a relationship with Christ, I would say start pouring your heart out to Him verbally or in a journal, asking for guidance and expecting answers within your mind. Take that guidance you receive and whole heartedly follow it. This will give you the courage to eventually, fully surrender this egotistical life you’ve depended on and has left you destitute.
To those who are not ready to under take this journey of awakening, this will all sound like crazy talk and will disregard it. Those like the people I’m working with weekly, are taking the first step and are admitting they do have a two part ego; the Fearful Victim and Angry Protector. When they live in awareness of them, they realize the ego’s thoughts, feelings and emotions are not their own and they can do something about it. As a result they are experiencing freedom and peace.
Gypsy Spirit (aka Rhonda Ferguson)
RFWellness90@aol.com