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Why New Year’s Resolutions Don’t Usually Work!

Writing out my New Year’s Resolutions/Goals for 2021, I wondered if my goals were sub-consciously rooted in idols (things I believe I need to have happen so I can be happy).

Next to each goal that I listed on my journal, I placed an “E” for ego (“I need this to happen so I can be happy”) and a “S” for spiritual (“This is ultimately to help others”)! Next I questioned wether or not I needed to accomplish this thing to be happy! I found that each one I questioned, I also gave a really good excuse or case as to why this thing was so crucial to my happiness. It’s funny how the ego can creep in and give what we think are truths to sabotage us.

When I got honest with myself and dismissed the excuses, I realized that many of my goals were created out of a sub-conscious form of guilt. For instance, “Cook Better Meals,” the real reason I want to cook better meals, is because I haven’t been wanting to put in the time to research healthy meals, do the shopping and then create them. I’d rather listen to my lazy, apathetic ego and make tacos! When I compromise and don’t do the things I know I should be doing, I feel guilty!

Here’s another one: “Have a fit and healthy body!” My ego has caused me to believe, being fit and healthy means happiness and in order to be fit and healthy, I’ll have to live a very self-controlled, intentional life, which of course I fail at daily, because I compromise and eat fake food and skip the workout, so guess what? I feel guilty.

What I’ve come to realize is this; if we really want to live a happy, healthy, peaceful life, we are going to have to get rid of the guilt. How do we do that? We do that by no longer compromising. The answer to rid ourselves of guilt, is to know what we want to accomplish long term and then make short term/daily goals. Most importantly we must follow Spirit’s guidance in order to fulfill them. We’ve got to stop giving into lazy, apathetic thoughts and instead , do the things we know we should be doing. Live intentionally and not by our feelings.

Here is your challenge should you accept it:

1. Make a list of your long term goals for 2021.
2. Identify which are from your guilty ego and which are placed in your heart by Holy Spirit.
3. Ask yourself “Why do I need this to happen in order for me to be happy?”
4. Ask yourself, “What’s the sub-conscious guilt I have, that created this goal?”
5. Realize that compromising, is simply not listening to Spirit’s guidance and instead, we choose to listen to the ego and be lazy, as a result we feel guilty for not doing what we know we should be doing.
6. Decide that you will follow Spirit’s guidance everyday no longer compromising, by ignoring the Spirit’s guidance and in return you will receive peace, confidence and calm.

Rhonda Ferguson

Identity Theft Restorer: Teaching people who they are and their purpose in this life, in order to free and empower them.